Filed under: marriage
I spent my 4th of July getting punched. Click and go read it. It’s entertaining.
My wife Ashley puts up with a lot. Everyday I leave cabinet doors open, forget where I put my wedding ring, forget to take my lunch to work, forget to take my cell phone to work, leave clothes out, leave shoes out, forget to unload dishwasher, leave the lid up, and usually have trouble finding things on a daily basis. I also lost my first wedding ring that cost about $200. I have tried to lose my 2nd wedding ring numerous times, but it only cost $30.
For example, today I left my cellphone at home, so I called Ashley to bring it for me, and she graciously did. I soon after realized I left my wallet at home as well. I couldn’t ask her to make 2 trips, so today I have no wallet.
All this is to say, I love you Ashley. Thanks for being patient with me. I’m messy, forgetful, aggravating, annoying, and at times irritable, but you still love me, and go above and beyond every single day. In my 27 years of life, the best years have been the ones spent with you! Next time, please just try not to punch me so hard.
Filed under: Christianity, books, marriage | Tags: anxiety, crazy love, francis chan, stress
**Confession**
I worry too often, I complain of stress, and I am at times consumed by anxiety. By the grace of God, I have seen these gradually disappear from my life, but they definitely still exist.
For 26 years (almost 27) of my life, God has always provided, but for some reason, I still worry about the future. I get irritable when we have unexpected car repairs because I hadn’t planned for it. However, God planned for it. He knew it was coming. He wasn’t surprised. I worry about things that are 5 years away. I get frustrated when I don’t have enough time to take care of things. Yet God has repeatedly shown me that He is taking care of every detail imaginable.
Ashley is always 100% reassuring in these kinds of times. Without her encouragement, I would be much worse off. She helps me realize that in reality, we have the money saved to pay for car repairs, I will have time to get things done, and God is still in control. I’m thankful for a wife who helps me see things in a clear, Christ-like perspective.
On a recent lunch break, I started reading Francis Chan’s Crazy Love. It was on a day where I felt overwhelmed with everything that was in front of me. When I made it to pages 39 and 40, the words just jumped off the page and hit me right in the face. Here are some words straight from those pages.
Crazy Love – pages 39-40
- Worry implies that we don’t quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what’s happening in our lives.
- Stress says that the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace toward others, or out tight grip of control.
- Both worry and stress reak of arrogance. They declare our tendency to forget that we’ve been forgiven, that our lives here are brief, that we are headed to a place where we won’t be be lonely, afraid, or hurt ever again, and that in the context of God’s strength, our problems are small, indeed.
- When I am consumed by my problems, stressed out about MY life, MY family, MY job, I actually convey the belief that I think the circumstances are more important than God’s command to always rejoice.
Phil 4:4 – “Rejoice in the Lord always.”
Phil 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything.”
I’ve got a TON to learn and a very long way to go.
I read the words, “Keep a short account” in something I was reading a few days ago. The thought has stayed with me since then. What does it mean to “keep a short account.” The image of a bill or invoice comes to my mind. Instead of having 30 items on the bill to pay for, there are only 2 or 3 items. Considering all items are equal, paying for 2 or 3 items is much easier than paying for 30 items. Forgiveness works the same way. When you are slow to forgive, the bill just gets longer and longer.
I believe 100% in the power of forgiveness. Forgiving is something that is hard to do when you’re in the moment, but a lack of forgivenss creates a bitter spirit before long. I would rather spend my life forgiving people instead of seeking revenge and harboring resentment. I’m far from perfect, but I want to be remembered as a person who was quick to offer forgiveness.
Even from a non-Christian perspective, forgiveness is powerful. According to the Mayo Clinic, “When you don’t practice forgiveness, you may be the one who pays most dearly.” They also go on to add that the benefits of forgiving someone are lower blood pressure, lower heart rate, fewer stress and anxiety symptoms, reduction in chronic pain, and improved psychological well-being.
I think God has helped me to practice offering true forgiveness in my life with those around me by giving me a forgetful mind and also by requiring me to constantly beg for forgiveness. I have the capability to forget things (sometimes things of importance) on a regular basis. I also have a tendency to fall short regularly. When I used to use a debit card daily, I had days when I forgot my PIN number. I constantly walk out of the house and forget to take my lunch. I too often forget to be romantic. Thankfully, I rarely remember disagreements or arguments that Ashley and I have (yes, spouses don’t always see eye to eye). Although I hate forgetting important things, some days I’m thankful that I’m forgetful, because it helps me be forgiving. Also, I often sin hourly, and it requires me to seek forgiveness more than I would like. And I’m thankful that we serve a just, but forgiving God.
Here are some great scriptures on forgiveness.
- Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. – Ephesians 4:32
- “Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.” – Leviticus 19:18
- Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. - 1 Peter 3:8-9
Forgiveness is powerful. It’s confusing. It’s not a natural response. I have had to ask for forgiveness more times that I care to remember. Because I need forgiveness often, that alone is enough to encourage me to forgive others. It’s obviously a selfish reason, and not the main reason we should be quick to forgive though. God has called us to forgive those who we love, and even our enemies who we don’t love.
So keep a short account. Don’t let grievances you share with someone build up.
Clear your list.
Forgive and forget.
Bury it.
Move on.
You’re not perfect. Don’t expect perfection.
Ask for forgiveness and offer it freely.
Life is dirty. Churches fail because forgiveness is not present. Marriages are destroyed because couples would rather keep an account of wrongs instead of consistently offering forgiveness. Don’t ever underestimate the power of forgiveness.
Who do you need to forgive? Who do you need to ask for forgiveness?
Filed under: Christianity, Ramblings, Religion, church, family, in the news, marriage, music, sports
Running/Exercising
- I have been trying to run a lot. It’s depressing how slow I run, but I did a little over a week ago. My feet have pretty much been numb/asleep since then.
- I went to the orthopedic doctor finally after 5 years of numb feet, and was diagnosed with Exertional Compartment Syndrome. I may have some small surgery to correct this, and should be good to go for the rest of my life.
- When I told Ashley about it, she said, “Oh honey, you have a syndrome.”
- I was able to run consistently for about 4 weeks though and lost almost 10 pounds. Running makes a big difference for sure!
News Stories
- An author believes there is “no such thing as virginity.” MSNBC ran an article about this lady and her book. Although I disagree with her 100% on just about everything, there is some truth to her argument. Here is one part I do agree with (at least a little bit.)
So while young women are subject to overt sexual messages every day, they’re simultaneously being taught — by the people who are supposed to care for their personal and moral development, no less — that their only real worth is their virginity and ability to remain “pure.” (Obviously I don’t think that a woman or man should find their only real worth in their virginity and ability to remain pure, but I can see what she’s attempting to say.)
- It is hard to teach moral development in a society that throws sex in your face everywhere you look. I’d love to go into further discussion in some comments with anyone who is interested.
- The story about Miss California finishing second in the Miss USA contest is very upsetting. She answered a question saying she was against gay marriage. Perez Hilton called her a bad name, and all of California has made her out to be the devil. I have a lot of opinions on this, and I could probably write 6 blogs about it, but I won’t.
- Wildfires in SC? Sad that Myrtle Beach is burning like crazy. Hope everyone stays safe and nobody is killed or injured.
Josh Hamilton
- Please, Please, Please go read this story right now! Josh Hamilton was the #1 draft in MLB in 1999. He ended up wasted on cocaine, heroine, and alcohol. He made an amazing comeback and is now playing for the Texas Rangers. He even made the All-Star team last year. He talks extensively about how Jesus rescued him from the life He was living. It is an amazing story of redemption, forgiveness, and God’s love.
Music
- I’ve almost finished learning Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata. Now I’m not saying it’s perfect, but I can almost play through the whole thing.
- I just purchased the new Jars of Clay album, The Long Fall Back to Earth. It’s amazing how over 10 years later, they have adapted and changed their sound to fit with the times. It sounds like it will be a great album.
- I also purchased Sara Watkins first solo album. She was 1/3 of Nickel Creek. If you don’t download the whole album, listen to “Where Will You Be.”
- Ashley and I are going to see Ray Lamontagne on Friday night. Should be tons of fun. She surprised me with the tickets. Thanks boo!
- I’m trying to sell my Taylor 814ce. Let me know if you know anyone interested!
Finally, Ashley and I are going to spend some time in Brevard/Asheville this weekend. It should be awesome. I hope the weather will be perfect!!! I’ll post some pics/updates when we get back.
Sunrise from Tennent Mountain
3 years ago TODAY I was fortunate to enter in to the sacred covenant of marriage with my beautiful wife Ashley. I can honestly say it has been the best 3 years of my life. I can think of nothing better than to spend each and every day with Ashley . She is a constant source of energy, encouragement, and wisdom for me. She is a great servant. She’s a hard worker. She’s a compassionate person. She has a heart unlike anybody I’ve ever seen before. She has an insatiable love for God’s word and strives to live a life that pleases Him every day. She encourages me spiritually and holds me to a high standard to be the husband that God has called me to be. One of the best qualities is her honesty. To me, this is a must in order to have a marriage that thrives. We also communicate well together.
I love sharing life with Ashley. I no longer live life as an individual – we get to live and experience life together as a team, and that’s about as good as it gets. We’ve seen the sunrise 1,095 times together so far, and I hope that we get to see at least 20,000 more!
